Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Randomness

To live,
To learn,
To love,
To laugh,
To spread "The Joy" with which I have been blessed
                   wherever I go
Let this be my Symphony.

Wrote this after reading the poem Symphony posted by Relyn here http://comesitbymyfire.blogspot.com/2011/03/sunday-morning-poetry_27.html

Sunday, March 27, 2011

25.03.2011

25.03.2011

My birthday, another year of life gone by, another year to look forward to, to try and live my dreams, bring them true, to try and give back to life at least a bit more than what it gave me.

Had a great time, when I least expected to, felt loved and blessed to have people around me who love and care for me the way they do, in their own ways, sometimes I fail to understand them, fight with some, sometimes I fail to even acknowledge a few. In my greed to have much more, I sometimes slight the treasures that I already have in form of friends and family, but life never forgets to send me happy reminders :). This reminder was the beautiful gift life gave me this birthday.

I am thankful to be so blessed and loved. Thankful to life for being so kind to me, for the miracle of my existence, for taking such good care of me, for filling my life with the presence of so many who care so much. 
And I hope I give back to u, life at least a bit of what I have been gifted.




Thursday, March 24, 2011

I Believe...

That the answer to those questions about life we keep coming across or asking ourselves time and again lie in :

Looking at life with the eyes and mind of a child, full of curiosity, curiosity not to understand life, but the curiosity of what life has to offer in return of the blind faith the child has placed in life.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Randomness

Keep still, my heart,
Nor ask for peace, when care may suit thee best,
Nor ask for love, nor joy, nor even rest,
But be content to love, whate'er betide,
And maybe love will bring thee to Love's side 



- Cheiro

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Being me

(My apologies for the length of this post, to any one who does read this!!, I don't think there will be many)

I remember being 15 days into 2011 (the year of the rabbit) and feeling like I had already lived through an entire year and dreading the rest of the year that was to come, Now having lived through 2 months of 2011 I wonder if I will scrape through this year intact and sane, chances are looking dim...

In these two months, the major emotions that have been on my mind, have been, 

Massive confusion, the feeling of hanging by the pendulum in between choices, where u know that one isn't very healthy for you and the other though healthy isn't what u would like to live with (I for some unfathomable reasons have the tendency to go for the fatalistic choices for the purpose of my joyful existence!!, I guess I was born in the year of the Mad hatter)

Growing helplessness, hopelessness & irritation having to deal day in and out with a family which on the pretext of love & concern is increasingly becoming more and more limiting, hindering and irrational. I can't turn my back on them for all the love I have for them and all that I owe to them and I can't go on living a compromise for the sake of them.

Somebody told me I am looking to live in a perfect world, when I expect my family to be understanding (considering I am a female species living in a country like India, with parents who are educated forward looking blokes, but are hard core conservatives when it comes down to walking off the set line.), the person told me living is a compromise, Family when it comes to family, World when it comes to world.

My question is Why? I have no answer. I can understand compromising in the world, they are strangers, U don't expect them to understand you, with them U have to fight for your terms and conditions (but, I have come across quite a few angelic strangers) but Why does one has to compromise to make people who are your own happy, Isn't love and concern supposed to releasing as against binding and holding u back from living your dreams? I think the problem lies in expecting or expectations (as a stranger on a random encounter had once told me)

And before somebody thinks, that I have forgotten my blessing, no I haven't, I know I am more blessed than many, but that doesn't mean I am not going to try and wish to be more blessed. 

All in all, I am, off late feeling like a jerk, a hard core selfish, self centered person. I think the problem lies not with others but with me, that I am plain incapable of adjustments, understanding, being happy or sustaining relationships. Gosh! I so hate myself for being me.

change

life goes on, 
joy comes by, so does sorrow 
love touches and passes by 
seasons come and go by,
people walk in and walk away,
only u remain changed, 
and yet chained
till death finally comes by.